There is a moment most solo parents recognize instantly.
The house is quiet. The kids are finally asleep. The day is technically over, but your mind is still wide awake. Somewhere between exhaustion and relief, the ache shows up. Not always for romance exactly, but for connection. For someone to share the load, to be known, to not feel so alone in the choices you are making.
In this conversation, Robert Beeson, Founder & CEO of Solo Parent, brings both lived experience and long view to the topic of dating after divorce. He is joined by Elizabeth Cole, a single parent navigating her own dating journey with honesty and self awareness, Amber Fuller, a counselor with a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy (MMFT) and a single parent herself, and Josh Stimpson, a single dad of 12 years who shares the hard earned perspective that comes from dating with kids and long term co parenting in view. Together, they explore dating not as a checklist or formula, but as an emotional landscape shaped by grief, growth, loneliness, hope, and responsibility.
Rather than offering quick answers, this conversation stays with the deeper questions solo parents often carry quietly. How do you know when you are ready. What happens when loneliness starts making decisions for you. And how do you date with integrity when your kids are part of every choice.
Key Insights from This Episode
- Dating after divorce brings mixed emotions. Curiosity, hope, fear, and grief can all show up at once.
- “Ready” is less about a timeline and more about being supported, honest, and clear on your values and boundaries.
- Kids change the dating equation. Moving slowly and intentionally protects their stability and your heart.
Dating after divorce can feel like hope and fear at the same time
Elizabeth shared that her first response to dating was, “I don’t have time for that,” followed quickly by curiosity and even excitement. That tension is familiar for many solo parents. You can long for connection while also feeling overwhelmed by the thought of letting someone in.
Robert named what makes dating especially complex in this season. The dating world has changed. You have changed. And now your kids are part of every decision. Old wounds and unresolved grief can surface quickly, making it easy to become reactive or to shut down altogether.
Amber and Robert both acknowledged how loneliness can quietly shape choices. Not always by pushing you into dating, but by influencing how fast you move, what you tolerate, and how much weight you place on early connection.
Being “ready” is often about being resourced, not just interested
Amber said she did not necessarily know she was ready when she started dating. Time had passed and she had been intentional about healing, yet her first relationship after divorce still brought significant heartbreak. What mattered most was not certainty, but support. She emphasized the importance of not being isolated and having people who could speak honestly and walk with you through disappointment and loss.
Josh described a shift that changed his approach to dating. He knew he was in a healthier place when he wanted a relationship, but did not need one to feel whole. He had rebuilt friendships, invested in his life, and no longer felt driven by urgency or anxiety.
Elizabeth added that early on she shared too much too fast because her self worth was low and her identity was tied to trauma. She believed she had to tell her whole story to be accepted. Looking back, she said that when going slow feels impossible, it may be worth examining what still needs healing.
Kids require a different pace, and intentionality is part of love
Dating as a single parent is never just about two adults. It is about timing, stability, and emotional safety for your kids.
Josh shared how intentional he was about introducing his kids to someone new. He slowed the pace, protected their routines, and was careful not to create confusion or premature attachment. His approach centered on protecting their sense of security while still modeling healthy relationships.
Elizabeth shared how much she learned from that intentionality. Even their introductions were planned and spaced out, and they waited longer before blending family time. That care mattered.
Amber offered a hard truth she learned over time. Even when a parent feels ready to date, kids may not be. They may need more time, more predictability, and more space to heal. Ignoring that reality can place strain on both the relationship and the family system.
The consistent theme was clear. Going slow is not about fear. It is about care. Care for your kids. Care for yourself. And care for the kind of relationship you are trying to build.
