Some seasons of solo parenting do not feel dramatic. They feel heavy in quieter ways.
You wake up carrying yesterday’s disappointments and tomorrow’s uncertainties all at once. You keep moving because stopping feels risky. And somewhere along the way, clarity starts to feel out of reach. Not because you are doing something wrong, but because survival mode has narrowed your vision.
This episode speaks directly to that lived reality.
It addresses the deeper challenges many solo parents face but rarely name out loud: being stuck in the past, overwhelmed by uncertainty, and unsure how to move forward without fixing everything at once. These pain points matter because they quietly shape how we parent, how we relate to ourselves, and how much hope we allow ourselves to feel.
Key Insights from This Episode
- Staying present creates clarity when the past feels heavy
- Peace does not require certainty about the future
- Gratitude and expectancy can reshape how we experience both hardship and joy
When survival mode keeps you from being present
Amber Fuller shared how easy it is for solo parents to live either behind themselves or far ahead of themselves. Pain from the past can pull us into endless what-ifs. Fear of the future can keep us bracing for impact. Both pull us out of the only place where life is actually happening.
She described presence not as a mindset shift, but as a daily practice. Staying grounded in today. Taking life in 24-hour increments. Asking what needs attention now rather than trying to rewrite what already happened or predict what has not yet come.
Elizabeth Cole reflected on how big, life-altering events often trigger toxic shame. Divorce, loss, or major transitions can turn reflection into self-attack. The mind starts replaying decisions, assigning blame, and quietly questioning worth.
The conversation highlighted an important distinction. Awareness helps us grow. Rumination keeps us stuck. Growth comes from learning with honesty, not punishing ourselves with hindsight.
Robert Beeson shared that one of the most freeing shifts for him was changing the question altogether. Instead of asking what he wished he had done differently, he began asking how he wanted to respond differently moving forward. That shift did not erase regret, but it gave it somewhere to go.
Finding peace when the future feels uncertain
Uncertainty has a way of stacking up for solo parents. Finances. Parenting outcomes. Health scares. Relationships. None of them exist in isolation.
Elizabeth spoke openly about how uncertainty fuels fear. When unanswered questions pile up, the nervous system stays on high alert. It becomes difficult to stay present because the future feels like a threat that needs constant monitoring.
Amber pointed out how quickly fear can distort perspective. A hard day becomes a prediction of lifelong failure. A child’s struggle becomes a forecast of who they will become. These thought patterns feel protective, but they quietly drain peace.
Robert reflected on his own season of organizational and financial uncertainty. Plans that fell through. Outcomes that could not be controlled. What ultimately brought steadiness was not resolving the unknowns, but acknowledging dependence on something greater than himself.
Peace, as this episode frames it, is not the absence of unanswered questions. It is choosing where to place your attention when answers are unavailable.
Filtering life through gratitude, expectancy, and awareness
Gratitude in this conversation is not about ignoring pain or forcing positivity. It is about noticing what is still present and still good, even in the middle of uncertainty.
Amber shared how perspective shapes experience. When we expect life to only bring hardship, we often miss moments of light. When we allow space for both hard and good to coexist, something softens internally.
Elizabeth offered a powerful reframe through her own story. In the midst of fear surrounding a health crisis, she noticed unexpected gratitude. Relationships shifted. Perspective deepened. Remembering past provision strengthened trust in future care.
Robert explained that gratitude and expectancy rarely start as emotions. They start as choices. Choices about what we look for. What we name. What we allow ourselves to believe might still be possible. Over time, those choices reshape how we experience our days.
One of the most meaningful moments in the episode came when the conversation turned toward gratitude for former spouses and past relationships. Not gratitude that erases harm, but gratitude that acknowledges complexity. Seeing the full picture allows healing to reach not just us, but our children as well.
